B3ta Post

Word!

I have had the best idea for a new television show ever. It is as follows:

It will be called either Do You Trust This Face? or Would You Trust This Face? and it will work like this.

There will be one contestant and the show will begin with them sat in the studio. There will be a huge screen in front of them and on it will scroll past a number of different faces. The contestant will be asked to pick the face that they think is most trustworthy and that they would most like to help them in a dangerous, life threatening situation - which will take place in the second half of the show (the show will be like 30 minutes or something).

So they pick the face and there is a little bit of, like, analysis stuff about facial recognition and how certain features of a face have connotation of different things like trustworthiness and shit. Then the host/hosts (probably Ant and Dec) say, 'Now it's time for a break, stay with us for the conclusion of tonights show" and the adverts start (it will be on ITV or Channel 4 because I had already written the stuff about adverts before I realized that the BBC, who I originally wanted to do the show, don't have adverts).

When it comes back after the break everything will be set up for the life threatening stunt and the contestant will be, like, hanging from a rope above some kind of huge spike and they need someone else to do something to guide them away from it or they will certainly die. So there is a little bit of build up and Ant or Dec (or both, it doesn't really matter) shouts, "And here's the face you chose!".

And here is the twist.

Here is the fucking twist.

A man comes out from behind a load of fireworks and smoke and stuff and he is carrying a tray and the camera zooms into the tray and on it is the face that the contestant chose, but that's it, just the face. Just a disembodied face lying on a tray and the joke is on the contestant because they though they were picking a person to help them based on that person's face but they weren't, they were picking the actually face and that is no used to them in this situation so they get impaled on the spike.

I think this will bring me fame and fortune. I rule at TV.

EDIT: Also, this idea is copywrited to me so you can piss right off Endemol!

Leicester '66 - Bob Dylan (unlimited downloads, in the .m4a format)*

I love Leicester, I have often heard it used as the butt of jokes but of all the places I have been to, lived and stayed in Leicester is my favorite. I also love Dylan, probably more than anything. This is why when I found the Leicester '66 bootleg, recorded at De Monfort Hall in 1966, up for download at expectingrain.com I was very excited. I would happily give up a limb (or two) to be able to go back in time and have seen this Dylan gig.

Bob's Boots says the following about the bootleg: "This previously unknown audience recording surfaced in the early 90s. As with most audience recordings of the day, it is not the best of quality. Add to that some problems of the mic being covered up for about 20 seconds during It's All Over Now Baby Blue, the tape player being shut off during Just Like Tom Thumb's Blues, and the batteries going dead during Desolation Row. To provide a continuous show, the manufacturer edited in the Colston Hall version of Desolation Row, and added the Leicester version as a bonus for the completists."

Tracklisting:

She Belongs To Me
Fourth Time Around
Visions Of Johanna
It's All Over Now Baby Blue
Desolation Row
Just Like A Woman
Mr Tambourine Man
Tell Me Momma
I Don't Believe You
Baby Let Me Follow You Down
Just Like Tom Thumb's Blues (cuts out)
Desolation Row

* Huge thanks to YeaHeavy who posted this on the Expectingrain.com Rare Dylan Recordings discussion board and is now my hero. I love you YeaHeavy.

I love the Four Yorkshiremen sketch. It is fantastic and because of this I have collected all the versions of it that I can find on YouTube here:

The Original Sketch from the "At Last the 1948 Show"

A live version by the Pythons

A version with Rowan Atkinson

Alan Rickman, Eddie Izzard, Harry Enfield and Vic Reeves preforming the sketch for the "We Know Where You Live" Amnesty show

Apperently there is a game based on this sketch. This sounds like a good game.

I am getting loads of hits to my website from people looking at this picture:

I find this very confusing, it appears on page five of the Google image search results for James Blunt and, if I was such a fan of the man as to search through five pages of his stupid, annoying, nob head face I would not choose to view a image of him being attacked, and probably killed, by a crazed swan.

I worries me that my site is being mostly visited by James Blunt fans